Monday, February 2, 2009

What my Sunday Study/Support Group is Working On

Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life by Marshall Rosenberg

The objective of NVC is to establish a relationship based on honesty and empathy.

"Clear and accurate knowledge of how our words and actions affect others is a major resource for personal growth and the ability to communicate effectively. NVC stresses taking responsibility for one's own feelings as well as actions."

Here are the principles in synopsis:

  • All our actions are based on human needs we're trying to meet.

  • Determine how we feel in relation to the concrete actions we observe.

  • What are the needs, values, and desires that create our feelings?

  • Learning to clearly express how we feel without blaming or criticizing and receive how others feel without hearing blame or criticism.

  • Reaching beneath the surface and discovering what is alive and vital within us.

  • Take joy in the well-being of ourselves and the well-being of others.

Conflict Reminders:

  1. Slow down. Slow down again.

  2. Ground yourself in present moment feelings.

  3. Focus on empathy and connection.

  4. Ask for help ( "Would you be willing...?)

  5. Continue to empathize until everyone affirms that their feelings and needs have been understood.

  6. Only then, explore solutions.

  7. Celebrate our peacemaking.


"When critical self-concepts prevent us from seeing the beauty in ourselves, we lose connection with the divine energy that is our source."

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