Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Independence

First, I'd like to recommend a new self-published book I just finished. It's a lovely fiction story that starts with five-year-old Lexi and her best-waitress-in-town mother, and keeps you fascinated through growth and resolution. The title is "Knowing Things", author is Erica Boardman Thomas. Well developed characters you care about; interesting situations; good story development; well written. For this first novel, Erica walked away with the top prize of $500 as the Best Book of the Year from the first annual Premier Book Awards. Congratulations, Erica!

Continuing the affirmations from Dyer's "Your Erroneous Zones":

I have a strong love for and devotion to family [but] I see independence as superior to dependence in all relationships. I treasure my freedom from expectations. My relationships are built on mutual respect. My love involves no imposition of values on the loved one. I put a high premium on privacy, which may leave some people feeling snubbed or rejected. I like to be alone at times and I will go to great lengths to ensure my privacy is protected. I am not involved with numerous love relationships. I am selective about my love. It is difficult for dependent or unhealthy people to love me. I want those I love to be independent, to make their own choices, and to live their lives for themselves. While I want to be with and enjoy others, I want, even more, for others to make it without crutches or leaning. I refuse to be dependent, or depended upon, in a mature relationship.

The values in these 'affirmations' obviously resonate with me. Dr. Dyer gives them as a portrait of a person who has overcome "erroneous" behaviours, or zones, as he calls them.