My Book Review of The Hour I First Believed

For me The Hour I First Believed by Wally Lamb is a literary event. Powerful, heavy, long – loved it.

The 700+ pages, in smallish font size, written in the first person, covered the Columbine shootings rather more than I would have chosen to revisit. But, I found that when I wasn’t otherwise engaged, I was thinking about the story life as if it were my own; almost a Being-John-Malkovich perspective.
The characters were often, if not mostly, in crisis which made me wonder at the strong connection I felt toward them. Wally hasn’t provided convenient villains to blame either; much like real life. If I could write a long novel, I’d write like this.
I am even more of a fan of Lamb’s than I was when I read his first novel She’s Come Undone. In that one, I had a hard time believing that the author wasn’t a woman. His sense of femaleness seemed too true for a male mind. I’m often wrong about such things. So here’s to you Wally Lamb – May you write prolifically.

The Tiger shall lay down with the Chihuahua

January 26th begins the Chinese Year of the Ox

Based on new moon change the Chinese New Year seems a good time for a new start. The Chinese Zodiac is a 12 year cycle. Each year of the 12 year cycle is named after one of the original 12 animals. Each animal has a different personality and different characteristics. The animal is believed to be the main factor in each person's life that gives them their traits, success, and happiness in their lifetime.

People born under the influence of the Ox are kind, caring souls, logical, positive; filled with common sense and with their feet firmly planted on the ground. Security is their main preoccupation in life, and they are prepared to toil long and hard in order to provide a warm, comfortable and stable nest for themselves and their families. Strong-minded, stubborn, individualistic, the majority are highly intelligent individuals who don't take kindly to being told what to do. If you were born in 1913, 1925, 1937, 1949, 1961, 1973, 1985 or 1997 - you were born under the sign of the ox.

The twelve animals of Chinese astrology: Rat, Ox, Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon, Snake, Horse, Sheep, Monkey, Rooster, Dog, Pig.

To find your own birth animal, and more, you can go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chinese_astrology

Just chat, chat...

Photo is of my mom, Ada Catherine Fritsch. Everyone called her Kay. I took the snap on July 28, 2007 at my brother Glenn's wedding to his lovely bride Ynez. What a great time we had!
The purse on her shoulder is the purse I'm using now.


Misplaced my keys this AM and wouldn't you know it, Sharon came over for a few minutes and found them in seconds. She's amazing at that. Oh, yes, they were in the cushions of the couch. Why didn't I look there? I went through the house, my purse got strip searched (and discarded), I even checked the car, it was locked so was hoping they weren't in there.

So keys restored and carrying a new purse. Well, it's actually one of my mother's purses that I inherited after she died last May. It's the first time I've used it. Smaller, but nicely organised with compartments. I can think even more often about mom by carrying it. Thanks mom, for everything you did for me over the 65 years of being my mom. I sure miss you.


After seeing the preview on another film, I ordered from Netflix the recent DVD of Charlie Bartlett. It's one of the best teen flicks I've ever seen. Which isn't saying much since teen themes are not on the top of my genre list, but this is an extremely well-cast (with Anton Yelchin and Robert Downing, Jr., etc.) , and has a good story flow. Compare to Ferris Bueller film. Laughs and tears in about equal portion.

On the same topic of films the new release The Curious Case of Benjamin Button with Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett sounds like a premise I'm interested in. Sharon told me about it after hearing about my post on 'living life backwards'. John was interested enough to say he'd take me to a showing on Sunday or Monday night as part of Valentine's gift. The preview online looks good. They usually do, eh? But it's the premise that interests me and maybe the nostalgic ambience too.

Good news on the doctor front. The heart specialist says no problems with mine and he gave the green light on knee operation. Pre-op will be the week prior.

3 Easy Exercises for Your Brain

Since reading My Stroke of Insight by Jill Bolte Taylor, Ph.D. I've become more interested in my brain, poor neglected thing that it is. It makes sense to me that both hemispheres could use a little exercise. I found these basic ones:

1. Blood Flow Switch On (especially good before studying or concentration) Sit or stand. On one of your hands, open your fingers so that your thumb and index finger are as wide as possible from each other. Place this open index and thumb into the slight indentations below the collar bone on each side of your sternum. Put the other hand over your navel. Press lightly in a pulsing way for about 2 minutes.


2. Cross Crawl (helps balance the flow between your 2 hemishperes, esp. for spelling, writing,listening, reading, and comprehension) Sit or stand. Put your right hand across your body to the left knee as you raise it, then left hand on right knee as if you were marching. Do this for about 2 minutes.


3. Hook Ups (good for situations where you are nervous to calm your mind and improve concentration) Sit, or if you must stand do so carefully. Cross your right leg over your left at the ankles. Lay your right wrist over your left wrist, link up your fingers, turn your hands toward your body. Rest your clasped fingers on your breast bone (center of your chest). Stay in this position, keeping ankles crossed and wrists crossed and breath evenly. You will feel noticeably calmer in a few minutes.

Another tip: Drink Water (before and during class or any stressful situation) Drinking water is very important since the brain is comprised of more water than any other organ of your body and under stress you can de-hydrate, negatively affecting your concentration.

The site I got these from was:
http://www.iolani.honolulu.hi.us/Academics/UpperSchool/English-Upper_School/EnglishFac/9braingym.htm

Living Backwards Might Be Interesting

I was finishing up Brad Meltzer's book The Book of Lies today and came across this bit on page 313:

" 'Wouldn't it be great if we could live life backwards? You start out dead and get that out of the way - then you wake up in old age and feel better every day. With each passing year, your illnesses disappear, and you get more hair, more handsome, more virile - and best of all, you keep getting younger, finally ending life as a fantastic orgasm.' "

As the father character says, the author meant it to be humorous, but it's interesting (to me) to ponder what that would be like; living backwards.

Seems to me you'd have to have first lived forward in order to have made the decisions that made up your life in the first place. Say that was the case. Then at a critical juncture, while living backwards, you see an important decision coming up that you could change. Perhaps you could change it and live forward again, just to see how that played out, then go back to living backwards again. Huh? Kind of a self-correcting life; a sort of post script?

Well, as you can see, I'm creating mind games. But if may be an interesting topic of conversation with certain of our family or friends perhaps. John and I had a good laugh talking about it.

Rally your hearts America

January 20th - Inauguration Day

An intelligent and beautifully worded view of where we are in history from Caroline Myss

is at this link http://www.myss.com/news/archive/2009/011509.asp

I quote here the last paragraph:

"[T]he American people responded to Barack Obama and his message of hope, anti-torture, ending the war, and realism about the fact that we will need to sacrifice to make it through the years ahead but – Yes We Can make it – tells me that the spiritual grace from this nation’s Contract is once again animated and on the mend. Americans should rally in their hearts, even if right now you are going through a time of difficult change. Think of America’s Sacred Contract and reflect upon creating something with the future in mind or being a part of something of service. This is the grace through which we will rebuild this great nation and with this grace, America will indeed be great once again but great in spirit, as it was once envisioned by those who first saw its potential. Welcome back America and may God bless and watch over President Barack Obama and his family." Caroline Myss Copyright 2009

my newest poem

When the Wild Wind Whistles

Sudden and furious as a temper,

rattling the window,

stopping thought,

demanding attention,

like a frustrated child to a distracted mother,

the wild wind whistles.

Violently it rages,

no care for tree limbs breaking,

flinging dirt through the air.

The wolf is trying to blow your house down.

Will your structure hold?

When the wild wind whistles there's nothing you can do,

Just hold on.

There, the storm is passing.

The clouds have flown.

Silent stars still crown us.

You see? You've come out whole.

7 Values of a Family-of-man Thinker

1. Kindness - joyfully treating others as persons of magnificence.


2. Patience - accepting the imperfections of others and self as works in progress.


3. Forgiveness - seeing the divine in others, and self, above their, or our, actions and decisions.


4. Courtesy - treating others as honored friends who have, are, or will be wounded.


5. Humility - determination to lift others up.


6. Generosity - offering time, abilities and money to help others.


7. Honesty - speaking the truth in love.

inspired by adapted from and elaborated on: Love Letters from God an article by Gary D. Chapman, PH.D.

Busy, busy, but what have I been doing?

Lately, it seems I either can't find time to turn the computer on, or I spend all day on it. One of the time consuming things I've been doing is typing up and shortening an already short story by Dick Francis for reading, get this, next Christmas. I know that I'll forget all about the story that I want for our church's participatory service next Christmas season unless I get it down now. So it's mostly done. Could still be shortened but I'll leave something to do next December. I didn't look for something new this past Christmas so ended up reading the same story by Walter Swan. Good though it is, I'd rather have something new than repeat myself.

Another time consuming chore is getting to doctor's appointments. I went to the orthopedic doc in Tucson last week and that pretty much takes your whole day. I did call my friend Dioney and arranged to meet her for lunch and I squeezed in a quick shop in Trader Joe's. Then yesterday I went to the heart doc in Sierra Vista. And now he wants another test done in Tucson before my scheduled knee surgery - February 9th.

My Signature Poem

Stages

by Hermann Hesse

from Magister Ludi: The Glass Bead Game

As every flower fades,

As all youth departs,

So life at every stage,

So our grasp of truth,

Blooms in its day and may not last forever.

Since life may summon us at every age

Be ready heart, for parting, new endeavor,

Be ready bravely and without remorse

To find new light that old ties cannot give.

In all beginnings dwells a magic force

For guarding us and helping us to live.

Serenely let us move to distant places

And let no sentiments of home detain us.

The Cosmic Spirit seeks not to restrain us

But lifts us stage by stage to wider spaces.

If we accept a home of our own making

Familiar habit makes for indolence.

We must prepare for parting and leave-taking

Or else remain the slaves of permanence.

Even the hour of our death may send us

speeding on to fresh and newer spaces,

And life may summon us to newer races.

So be it heart, bid farewell without end.

Individuality

Quoting John O'Donohue's Anam Cara pg. 124: "The shape of each soul is different. There is a secret destiny for each person."

The earliest memory I have of talk about individuality, was in high school, about 10th grade (circa 1957) I think, the boys I liked were always talking about it. That and live fast, love hard, and die young. I don't know how the two are connected, but in my mind they are. Mr. O'Donohue goes on to say: "We need to return to the solitude within to find again the dream that lies at the heart of the soul." Meditation is implied and right brain vs. left, or at least a balance.

"We need to feel the dream with the wonder of a child approaching ...discovery. When we rediscover our childlike nature, we enter into a world of gentle possibility. ...The false burdens fall away. We come into rhythm with ourselves."

The Two Wolves Inside Us

This native story was in an email from my cousin Arlene in Canada. It is the old wisdom.

Two Wolves

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son, the battle is between two "wolves" inside us all.

One is Evil: anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good: joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence,empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

Camel Attitude according to Arthur Weigall

I have an affinity with camels, and so does my grandson, A.J.. He met one in a family friend's stable when he was about 5 or so years old. Somewhere in my box of photos is the one I took of him communing with that young camel.

[The quoted material below is not my opinion but the author's.]
This is from Arthur Weigall's story Laura, A Camel with a Grievance 1932:

"All camels are discontented. They hate being camels, but they would hate to be anything else because in their opinion all other living creatures are beneath contempt, especially humans. The expression upon their faces when they pass you on the road indicates that they regard you as a bad smell.

"They nurse a perpetual grievance against mankind and ruminate upon their wrongs until they groan aloud. Yet when you go to them to find out what is the matter, they give you no hint of any specific trouble, but merely look at you with sad, reproachful eyes and groan more loudly, or, in certain cases when their sense of unbearable insult is overwhelming, try rather half-heartedly to bite you.

"The fact that a camel has yellow teeth, a harelip, a hump, corns and suffers from halitosis, places the poor creature beyond the range of ordinary sympathy: people ... never put their arms around camels, or stroke or kiss them; and yet their sorrowful eyes, fringed with long, languishing lashes are beautiful, and their whimpering is heart breaking.

"Camels do not ask for love or pity. They have been domesticated and enslaved for so long that they make no response whatsoever to overtures of that sort, but continue to loath and despise you no matter how kindly you treat them or how well you feed them. The very sight of you makes them feel sick and their one request seems always to be that they may be allowed to go away and die.

"Their days are irksome to them; they have no hope; unlike many animals, they have no rudiment of religion; they make no friends; they just complain and unwillingly submit.

"When they are being ridden they do not attempt to cooperate with their riders, and when they are being used as beasts of burden they protest indignantly but ineffectually against their loads, and try their best to make you feel a cad."